I thank both Will and Tim as I know they import in the ideal was not only indepth but of the intellectual persuasion. People who have known me throught out the years have noticed I have changed and I have expanded but once again I have seen myself do this growth as if I was not the one doing it. I think that is the point I meant to over stress but not expand apon. I know I have seemly talked my talk about this topic but when you have lived most of your life in a state of constant changing and suddenly force to stop and situate yourself and your future you two will wonder what it is to live, what it is to be happy and what is there to look forward to. I am going to insert some lyrics to a song I am listening to and see if any of you can realize how this would reflect onto me and how I have been, and although some of you may be looking for the deep complex answers, in life and reality when someone ask you to hand them the wrench you should not hand him a orange and argue that it is a wrench and the person if just looking at it right. Hell consider this a two pointer if you can name where this song is from, As you all should know I am a movie junkie and I shall say this now and only a few may understand this: onitnarat nintneuq seod os dna klat srorrim The song is titled Little Green bag, I suggest you give it a shot. Yeah Lookin' back on the track for a little green bag Got to find just that kind or losin' my mind Outta sight in the night, outta sight in the day Lookin' back on the track, gonna do it my way Outta sight in the night, outta sight in the day Lookin' back on the track, gonna do it my way Lookin' back Lookin' for some happiness but there is only loneliness to find Jump to the left, turn to the right Lookin' upstairs, lookin' behind Lookin' for some happiness but there is only loneliness to find Jump to the left, turn to the right Lookin' upstairs, lookin' behind Yeah Lookin' back on the track for a little green bag Got to find just that kind or losin' my mind Outta sight in the night, outta sight in the day Lookin' back on the track, gonna do it my way Lookin' back on the track for a little, little green bag Got to find just that kind or losin' my mind Lookin' for some happiness but there is only loneliness to find Jump to the left, turn to the right Lookin' upstairs, lookin' behind Lookin' for some happiness but there is only loneliness to find Jump to the left, jump to the right Lookin' upstairs, lookin' behind As we all realize we have times of weakness and times of strenght but I know this is a comman syndrome of all animals and living organizms. Even the trees themselves have times of weakness and dispite most belief it would not be the winter which cause them to shed their leaves and become lifeless statues, well atleast the looks of one. Their true time of weakness would be also their time of great strenght, it would be the sunny day, the sun is needed for the break down of photosynthesis but if goes on to long it now can become their weakness. Drought would be the common word most would think and that would be the correct word to use, when it doesn't have enough energy to work but still trying to work it kills itself slowly. And this is the point of the night I switch to something more classical, Beethoven's Moonlight Sonata. If any of you were at all curious what has been brought apon me to be open about myself, the self that is here currently I couldn't even tell you for I am no longer sure of that anymore and I really although am sorta sad that I could not explain why I have decided to down my present life in order to clear out the past. I think now although am not sure the true reason I am trying to move on in my life as I have hit a fork in the road and have not decided which path to tread apon knowing once I take one path there is not a chance to turn back for a long while. I know some will say this is just a nervousness of entering college but that it not it. I have been looking forward to college for a while now, probably since I saw what a challenge it was for my brother and knowing I have a harder course has got me gearing to go. I am a man of challenge, the more of a challenge the more I work at it to overcome and I do not ever consider not completing or beating it as a failure cause failure is only a lack of success and even in failure you have succeeded something along the way. My father sad it the best to me when I was younger "You can never fail as long as you try." Although for a while I was, and still am angry at him for expecting me to be my brother when it comes to life choices. I have to admit sometimes we do have comman grounds but that is so few that my own parents seeing them mistake us can anger me because I am disguisted by my brother and the way he is, but that is alot to explain and stuff I shall not bother you with.